Dad Jokes about society

What kind of ending do Dutch people prefer in their stories?

A new beginning.

What did the bank say to the affordable housing project?

We can't give you any credit for your foundations.

What do hospital patients say when Martha's rule improves their care?

It's a rule transformation.

What do you call a Guardian journalist who keeps dropping calls during a telethon?

A hung reporter.

Why did the geography teacher's new Middle East lesson open students' minds?

Because it was a whole new world atlas.

What do you call housing that's really cramped but still passes modern building codes?

A dwelling card house.

What did the government offer that made union workers feel like vegetables?

A measly raise.

Why did the government auditor hit the carer's allowance record?

Because it needed to strike a balance.

What do gynecologists call their waiting room?

The patient room.

Why did the UK carer feel settled at the bank?

Because they got their care balance.

What did Blackpool say when life expectancy dropped to UK's lowest?

We're really hitting rock bottom.

What did the NHS boss say when they were too cold to talk?

Let me get Streeting.